Monday, April 16, 2012

The never ending Rut

I have decided that I am in a rut. Now, just because it's a rut doesn't mean its bad....some ruts are fun when you're in a vehicle with large wheels. BUT I am in one. I think its a rut that almost everyone has to go through when they get married young.
Let me explain this rut. I am stuck at my job because we are poor and I really kinda have to work to survive (comfortably). Jordan is stuck at his job because he doesn't have the infamous college degree that will get him a better paying one. We are stuck in our apartment and cannot buy a house because A. we don't have the money and, B. we are not sure where we will end up when Jordan graduates. Also I am stuck in this college trap and can't seem to find my way out...

I do have a lot of reasons to smile in this rut. I love my husband. He is always making me laugh and helps me to see the positive side of everything, Both sets of my family are so full of love and want to see me and Jordan succeed, and our friends are awesome and we have so much fun together. We are also planning on going to Lake Powell 3 times this summer so... life can't be that bad! :)

I think the hardest part of this rut is not being extremely focused on where I want to be a few years from now. Sometimes I find myself so focused on getting to the future that I forget to enjoy what I have now. Earlier today I caught myself putting my brain in a time machine and sending it ten years forward and when I "got back", I looked outside and saw the sun, the cool clouds, and green grass. and then..poof..I felt guilty for wishing away the beauty that was in front of me right then.

Now, saying that I am not going to focus too much on the future is easier said than done. SO, here are my goals for helping me to love my rut.
  • Exercise outside (when I run outside I notice details I don't normally when I drive)
  • Take more pictures of things that I do, & take pictures of beauty around me
  • Watch less TV (except for Ellen... I will put time aside for that that show because she makes me laugh)
  • Set a specific night of the week aside for a date with Jordan. (We try to do this, but we need to be better at it because I don't want us to take each other for granted)
  • Think pink. :) pink things make me happy! This just means I will just be more positive overall.
  • Keep a gratitude journal. (my mom gave me one for Easter, and I think this could be very effective) (thanks mom!)

Well onward ho with life I go,

Merrily on my way,

I hope I can obey my plan,

and enjoy what I have today.

Love, Jess

IN:

1) Ruts

2) anything pink

3) poems

OUT:

1) time machines

2) vegging in front of the TV .... :(

3) navy blue. ew.


3 comments:

  1. YAY I'm excited for your blog. It's tough going to school and being at a less than ideal job, but it is what you make it. You guys are so great. I hope you will be around when we come out to Utah in June. There's a new little boy that I'm sure would love all that Uncle Jordan has to teach!

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    1. Why thank you! :) We are going to Lake Powell the first week in June, but when are you coming?? I can't wait to meet the little one! (Jordan loves babies by the way...but usually they are scared of him haha)

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  2. I just realized I put June. We are planning on mid July. We'll be there for a couple weeks.

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